"No no– Heaven is that way!"
  Suggestions on a better way to design highrise communities for the very old.
  10 Symptoms of Employee Burnout
  Ten ways to know if you're becoming a victim of "burnout" on your job.
  Access Design, Cats/Dogs
  How to design your home to permit or block access by humans, dogs, and cats to different areas.
  Activist and Scientist Parable
  An ironic fable which contrasts "personal" and "professional" interests in disease treatment.
  The Adventures of Felix Cull, Cat-Man
  The cloning of cat and man resulted in Felix, who has had quite a time adjusting to life in the human world. Here is a collection of his social, athletic, and romantic adventures, and a photo.
  Advice First, Then Money
  A commonsense approach to homelessness- or, how to live cheaply in a 21st Century city.
  Advice for Cat Owners
  Every wondered about the semiotics of kitty's "gift" of a nearly-dead rodent? This essay explains it all.
  Affirmative Action Letter
  Gently reminding an enthusiast that a lot of white men could use affirmative action, too.
  Affirmative Inaction
  We bend the rules so that more Blacks and Latinos can get into prestigious colleges; here's a proposal to bend other rules so that fewer Blacks and Latinos go to prison for drug-law offenses.
  AIDS and Class
  A first attempt to examine the role of social class in the way AIDS is experienced.
  An AIDS Conundrum
  A new twist on an ancient refutation of religious fundamentalists.
  Alphabet of Gaydom
  The gay world consists not merely of the A-list and the B-list, but of seven more "letters" and innumerable combinations thereof...
  Amazing Taste
  New lyrics for an ancient hymn.
  Antivisible Man
  People we really don't want to see are more than merely invisible; they occupy a strange kind of "negative space".
  Aspects of Three Holocausts
  Observations on cities where AIDS is devastating gays (San Francisco), IDUs (Milan), or heterosexuals (Lusaka).
  Automobile Horns and the Need for Clearer Communication
  A way to sweeten- or at least articulate- that most irritating of urban noises.
  Barefoot Epidemiologist
  How an amateur could, in two weeks, do a good estimation of the size of a city's drug-abusing population.
  Beggar's Brass Bowl
  A proposal to register beggars and encourage them to be "street concierges" in exchange for alms and other generosity.
  The Best of Times, the Worst of Times
  My personal choices for the two most hopeful, and the two most troubling, potential directions for the AIDS epidemic in the 2000-2010 decade.
  Big HIV Spread Among Young Gays
  Back-calculation from AIDS surveillance data suggests that lots of young gay men are getting infected.
  Blood on Their Hands: The Judgment of History
  Reflections on the only punishment ever likely to be meted out to ruling-class policymakers whose decisions cost thousands of lives or billions of dollars.
  Boar's Head Carol
  A homoerotic extra verse for the traditional Oxford Christmas carol.
  Boredom: A Safe, Legal Way to Achieve Altered States of Consciousness
  My revenge for all the tedious meetings I've had to endure in my academic and professional life.
  A Brief History of the After Sobriety Movement
  Speculation upon a world where "sobriety" is a valuable commodity on the free market, exchangeable for "life therapy" vouchers.
  The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Sugar
  An imaginary press release in 2013, when America's three big legal drugs finally become taxed in proportion to the damages they do.
  Canines, Felines, and Respect
  The respect we accord to dogs is unrelated to their size, but with cats, our respect is directly correlated to how big they are.
  Cat Fanatics
  How to distinguish a true cat fanatic from a mere cat lover.
  If there's "dogma" and "dogmatics", surely there must be "catma" and "catmatics"...
  Cavaliers and Roundheads in HIV Prevention
  A metaphor for the controversy between Harm Reduction and Abstinence.
  Cheer Up
  A dozen irreverent recommendations for coping with the second Bush administration.
  Civilization Follows the Vine
  The Romans believed that planting a vineyard was the first of many stages to civilizing a new frontier of their world. Here's a rendition of those stages, nine in all.
  Climbing Beacon Hill
  Renovation recapitulates rising: when you renovate a house, you symbolically reexperience your own upward social mobility.
  Cocaine and Corn Syrup
  A hundred years ago, the Feds made the Coca-Cola company remove a harmful substance- cocaine- from their drinks. Will the Feds now do the same for an even more harmful substance?
  Cock Size in Gay Escorts Ads
  A statistical examination of how the claims of "escorts" may jibe with reality.
  Cold Contract
  I'm a frequent sufferer of the common cold. I get lots of advice from well-meaning people about preventions or cures. "Cold Contract" asks them to put their money where their mouth is, or shut up.
  Combination Therapy: Too Costly, Too Little, and Too Late
  "Cocktail therapy" is welcome, but what about the worldwide majority of HIV+ people who can't afford it? Will it divert energies from education and prevention? And how much difference will it ultimately make?
  A Comparison of Seven Dangerous Environments
  An epidemiologist's cool-headed look at several modern perils which have seen much hot-headedness and innumeracy.
  Consequences of Partial Compliance With Safer HIV Practices
  A surprising finding: reducing your risky practices by two-thirds is much more than twice as good as reducing them by one-third.
  Consuming Passions
  Eight psychoactive substances- four of them legal and four illegal- dominate the American scene. Here's a summary of what they cost, what damage they do, and what they'd look like on your kitchen table.
  Cost Effectiveness of HIV Prevention
  In San Francisco, it now costs ten or a hundred times as much to avoid each new HIV infection as it did a decade ago. Here's why...
  Country Pleasures
  Here are all the ways two very different sorts of people— "Country Music" fold and "Whole Foods" aficionados— share a love of rural aAmerica.
  Crack Abuse Study
  Results of research we conducted at the Haight-Ashbury Clinic in 1991-92.
  Crack Abuse: What Is to be Done?
  A distillation of the best ideas of a staff that worked on the subject for two years.
  The Cultural Evolution of AIDS Agencies
  This essay suggests that AIDS agencies have a life cycle of birth, growth, maturity, and decay, just like most institutions...
  The Cultural Evolution of Drug Treatment Programs
  Drug programs, like societies, evolve: from Heroic origins, through the Classical and Imperial epochs, finally ending in Decadence.
  A Defense of the English System
  My defense of a sensible system, with measures of length and volume geared to a human scale.
  While the "Dogs Played Poker" in the famous scene, what were the cats doing? They were up in the manor house, dressed elegantly and playing bridge.
  A Diatribe on Modern Medicine and the Common Cold
  Why haven't these high-paid doctors found a cure?
  Dr. Newmeyer's Method of "Quick Psychotherapy"
  "Why can't everyone be as even-tempered as me? How can I help people to snap out of a bad temper?"
  Dress for Sveltness (or, A Diatribe Against Diets)
  An argument that, for keeping those pounds off, burning calories to stay warm in a cool climate is superior to demoralizing diet or tedious exercise.
  Drug Abuse and Public Policy Failures
  Does drug abuse treatment do any good? Have we been "too little, too late" in fighting the speed epidemic? What fundamental truths about substance use are our politicians blind to?
  The Duesberg Heresy
  Some easy epidemiological exercises to test the Duesberg hypothesis that HIV is not the cause of AIDS.
  Elements at the University
  No fewer than 19 atomic elements have their departmental "champions" at the university.
  Elizabethan Age
  On why the Second Elizabeth's era might be just as great as the First Elizabeth's.
  Embarcadero Proposal (February 1991)
  If US bombs could tear down the Iraqi infrastructure so easily, why not let them do the same for the useless Embarcadero Freeway?
  The End of the MidCity Consortium to Fight AIDS
  A brief account of the rise and fall of a pioneering outreach program.
  An Epidemiological Virtuous Circle
  In these later stages of the America's HIV epidemic, lowered infection rates are leading to even lower rates, in a virtuous circle.
  Estimating the Gay Population
  An argument, based on US census data, that the total may be smaller than we think.
  The Ethanol Gardens: A Proposal for Alcohol Maintenance
  This essay suggests that public inebriation would be less noxious if cities set aside overnight camping grounds where booze can be bought cheaply.
  Eulogical Workplace
  Signs that indicate a work or family environment is more than merely healthy.
  Europe, America, and AIDS
  Europe and America are both prosperous, developed regions with thriving gay and IDU subcultures. But one is surviving AIDS way better than the other. Here's why.
  On the quiet disappearance of burglars, junkies, and speedfreaks from America's rich cities.
  Falling Victim to Nature's Fury: The Canine and Feline Models
  I've lived in both Boston and San Francisco. This essay expands on the very different sorts of dread I've felt in those two places.
  Feline Intervention to Rightsize Self-Esteem
  Sometimes people need therapy for excess self-esteem- they're too proud, too arrogant, too rude. What better therapist than a cat?
  Fin de Siecle
  Will the fin of the Twentieth Century be the finest ever? Here's the main competition from the Second Millennium...
  Finishing Golden Boys or, The Making of a Male Geisha
  A proposal for a school for young male geishas, to the benefit of all.
  Five-Handed Bridge
  Rules to enable five to play America's favorite four-handed game.
  Forgiving or Punishing "Slips"
  Why single unsafe acts are much more dangerous in the world of hepatitis C than that of HIV.
  The Four Levels of F.W.O.O.O.M.P.
  If we delay in lighting a gas stove, the result is a "fwooomp", whose violence depends entirely upon the length of the delay...
  The Four-Forked Road
  In 1998, we find ourselves very near the end of the Age of AIDS, at least as we've know it in the U.S. What's a well-meaning AIDS expert to do now?
  Fox Hunting Explained
  Celebrating people's bucolic romps with Man's Best Friends and Third Best Friends.
  Fragment of a Letter to Philip Fleesum, Esq.
  The combination of an arrogant lawyer, a letter-of-the-law bureaucrat, and a missing "n" in "annum".
  Friendly Joshing During the Grand Prix d'Evolution
  For millions of years three orders competed to be top dog on Earth: primates, felines, and canines. Here's how they teased one another.
  Gay Philanthropy and the Homeless
  Some ideas as to how gay men can help resolve this vexing problem.
  General Gough
  A fanciful biography of the Imperial Englishman for whom Gough Street was named.
  A General Theory of Drug Abuse Policy
  America has three strategies for addressing drug abuse. They struggle with one another, but none can prevail; the result is a perpetual, expensive, and frustrating stalemate.
  Good Cop, Bad Doc
  An argument that cops will get better and better, and doctors worse and worse, at providing social services such as HIV prevention.
  GOTCHA! A Wilderness Game for Two Players
  The rules and strategy of an ancient game, played between prey and predator.
  My personal definition for this exquisite phenomenon.
  The Great Engine of Gay Men's Health
  How to get gay men to pay for three things that will lengthen their lives.
  The Great War and the Great Plague
  The Great War is World War One and the Great Plague is AIDS; much is similar about the ways young men endured these catastrophes.
  Handy Phrases with Which to Cope with Twentieth Century Life
  Smart remarks in the political context appropriate to seven languages.
  Hap Day, Noted Gladhander, Found Dead in East Village
  My retaliation against a particularly obnoxious manifestation of 1970s culture.
  Harvard Gay Life
  Reminiscences of being gay at Harvard in the late 1960s.
  Hepatitis C: The Great Time Bomb
  We should worry less about HIV and AIDS, and worry more- MUCH more- about hepatitis-C.
  The Hidden Kingdom of Marsupials
  Speculation on advanced evolution in an ice-shrouded, Antipodean, soon-to-be-Antarctic place.
  HIV and Age: The Great Paradox
  You might think that older adults would learn to avoid AIDS
  HIV Prevention: Our Midterm Grades
  In San Francisco in 2000, our grades for prevention effectiveness are B+ for IDUs and heterosexuals, and F for gay men. Here are some suggestions for improving that failing grade.
  HIV Spread Among Speed Users
  Reasons why HIV spreads fast among people who use methamphetamine.
  The Holocaust of Gay Men
  Is AIDS as much a cataclysm for the world's gays as Nazism was for the world's Jews?
  How Much Noise Do We Live With?
  Findings in various parts of San Francisco.
  How Often Do You Want to Drive That Far?
  If it takes you X minutes to get to your country getaway, just how often will you be willing to get away?
  How to Issue Commands to Your Pet
  Good pet instruction is simply good journalism- but cats need nine pages where dogs need one.
  How To Tell if You're “Old Money”
  This essay will help you to know if your vintage has reached maturity- or if sufficient time has passed for the fundamental crime to be forgotten.
  How to Tell Whether You Are In San Diego or In Cape Town
  A mocking of the genteel apartheid of the U.S.A.
  How You Can Gauge the Epidemic
  Four easy tests that you can do to see whether your local AIDS epidemic is waxing or waning.
  The Hundred Billion Dollar Understanding
  AOL Time Warner and the Pentagon surely can burn through huge sums of money. Here's how to visualize just how huge.
  The Hungarian's Revolving Door
  "A Hungarian is a man who can enter a revolving door after you, but emerge before you." Here's a design for such a door.
  Ideal Casino
  Casinos are just too tawdry these days. Here's a description of an elegant alternative.
  In a Hurry? Walk!
  Sometimes public transport is literally slower than a walk...
  The Innocent Pleasures of Adulthood
  In which the notion of a "simple, innocent childhood" is refuted.
  The Institute for Policy Negation
  Well-intentioned people want to reform the world through innovative social policies, which often make things worse. Perhaps it's time for a Counter-Reformation.
  An Ironic Reversal
  Nowadays, young gay men are less HIV-ridden than older gay men, but the opposite may be true in a few years.
  Jerks- A Media Campaign
  Hiring Madison Avenue to make America believe: "Tweaker equals jerk".
  Junkie's Rental Rights
  Junkies sometimes (o horrors!) use pay toilets to shoot up. Maybe they have a right to do so...
  Learning from History
  How San Francisco responded to the great flu epidemic of 1918, and lessons for the great AIDS epidemic of today.
  Lesbians and HIV Disease
  Should lesbians worry about HIV? Not unless they sleep with men or use the needle...
  Leshner Letter
  Reminding America's drug czar that US policies have not worked, and isn't it time to consider legalization?
  Let's Start Later
  Three good reasons to start (and end) the school day two hours later.
  Letter on Prime Time Violence
  Bemoaning the fact that Americans are squeamish about erotic affection between men and simulataneously inured to the point of numbness about violence among males.
  Lighting a Candle How One Citizen Copes with Litter
  A call to commit a few minutes' work each week picking up litter, and thereby launch a "virtuous circle".
  Living Wakes
  A Living Will enables a person to choose the timing of his dying. Perhaps, then, his wake could be scheduled before rather than after his death...
  Magnum Opus: Reflections on the Bicameral Mind
  A paean to psychotropic drugs and altered states of consciousness; I still enjoy the same glimpses of Paradise that energized this 1968 essay, but I would certainly modify much of its social science...
  A Measure Most Grim
  In my address book are the names of 115 friends and acquaintances who've been diagnosed with AIDS. What has happened to them?
  Mobutu Letter
  Advice to President-for-Life Mobutu as to how to lead a heroic counterattack against the rebels.
  A Modest Proposal
  It's sometimes hard to get gay men to practice safer sex. Why not hire beautiful rent boys to show them how it's done?
  My Failed HIV Initiative
  An account of my abortive attempt to get the Feds to sponsor nationwide bleach distribution so that IDUs could disinfect their rigs.
  A New Coinage System
  My expression of love for a golden past, when coins felt worthy and real in the hand.
  News from 1535
  Clippings of the Wall Street Journal, Vanity Fair, and Architectural Digest from the year 1535.
  The Nine B's Which Demarcate Youth from Middle Age
  An (admittedly self-serving) cry of triumph for my fitness-minded generation: by God, we shall redefine when middle age begins!
  Nine Wars and a Plague
  A review showing that AIDS has killed more young people than just about any of America's wars.
  Notes Concerning the Enfranchisement of Cetacea
  What it would mean to give whales and dolphins the vote.
  A Notice to DOG LOVERS of San Francisco
  On Contradiction
  Four pesky contradictions which beguile our war against HIV.
  On Dozing Off at Conferences
  Answers the question, "How quickly am I going to doze off after lunch?"
  On Neighborhood Cohesion
  Ten ways to augment connectedness and community in your neighborhood.
  Otello the Maor
  Visualizing the lethal interaction of man and moa in the New Zealand of a thousand years ago.
  Patriotic Ethanol
  The real cost of vodka is about one cent per shot. So let's create a proud American brand, drive out the competition, and put the profits to a good cause.
  People of the Political Right Whom I Respect: A Short List
  Personal recommendations of a handful of worthy champions for the other side.
  Periodic Table of the Greatest Culinary Elements
  A parochial view of the basic food elements which form the basis of gustatory pleasure.
  A Perspective from the Bronx
  Some observations on HIV disease and drug use in a part of New York City that has many problems, but keeps going nonetheless.
  Pets and Spiritual Health
  How Fido and Tiger enable you to become more loving, more centered, more blissful.
  Poor Day, Rich Life
  The richer you are, the longer the perspective you take on life. "Poor Day, Rich Life" examines this phenomenon in household shopping, substance use, and HIV treatment.
  Predictions Hopeful and Dire
  On five aspects of the future course of AIDS, optimists and pessimists make radically different predictions.
  Preventing HIV Among Gay Youth
  Seven innovative ways to help young gay men avoid HIV.
  A Proposal for Slowing HIV Contagion Among Africans
  I propose that lubricants, because they are "sex-positive" in a way condoms are not, can save millions of lives.
  Public and Private Theft
  Or, why Communism failed: an argument that it's far, far easier to "steal" from the faceless public than from a private individual... and stealing takes many forms.
  Quartet for Drugs of Our Time
  These are program notes for a musical composition which evokes the interplay of tobacco, speed, heroin, and cocaine- each with its own "voice"- in the postwar San Francisco scene.
  Quartet Notes
  Notes for a brief synthesizer quartet , with the "voices" representing the ebb and flow of heroin, cocaine, speed, and tobacco over the last 50 years. (The quartet was commissioned from Don Seaver, and first performed in December 1995.)
  The Real Locus of HIV Risk
  Who is still at risk for HIV infection these days, and why? A look at some fascinating San Francisco interview data.
  Reflections on Do the Right Thing
  On the general theory of Noise as a defining cultural element for the poor and a setter of race against race.
  A Reverie on "Cultural Buffers"
  A fanciful world in which cocaine is a weak, legal, everyday drug, but caffeine is superstrong, illicit, and dangerous.
  Road Grace
  A brief commentary on the millions of drivers practicing kindness and courtesy on the roads of California.
  Rules for Six-Handed Contract Bridge
  A variant of my favorite game, with 78-card decks, blue suits, and occasional betrayal of partners.
  Ruling Class
  Advice from Cato the Cynic to a ruling class that desires to stay on top.
  Salesman's Business Card
  What to do with his card while you idly listen to his pitch.
  The Second World Sets Its [HIV] Course
  How AIDS is emerging in the former Soviet empire.
  Sensing the Wine Cellar Disaster
  If you're the cellar-master of a big Northern California winery, how do you assess the impact of a big earthquake? Let your five senses do the job...
  The Servants' Century Off
  All our lives, it seems, we've had to do our own cooking and cleaning. Not to worry, the servants will be back soon. You see, they like to take a century off every 550 years or so...
  Seven - Handed Bridge
  How seven people can play America's favorite four-handed game.
  Seven Paths of Upward Social Mobility
  Inspired by a drive from South Chicago to Kenilworth, at the end of which I pondered, "if I had grown up there, how could I have come to belong here?"
  Seven Virtues of Gay Men
  An enumeration of the major ways whereby gay guys become local heroes.
  Sharing Prevention Money Fairly
  To match San Francisco's HIV prevention effort, the rest of the U.S. needs to spend about three times as much. If it did, then maybe it would see the same gratifyingly low HIV incidence rates.
  The Shoe that Didn't Drop
  Three worrisome predictions about a "second wave" of AIDS in America that- thus far- aren't coming true.
  Short and Tall Men Together
  Imagining a club catering to the intense attraction that short and tall gay men often have for one another...
  A Short History of the Conquest of the Crack Epidemic
  A fantasy that coca-leaf tea -- weak, legal, and regulated -- could squeeze "crack" out of the market.
  Sick and Poor, Sick and Rich
  An enumeration of the many, many reasons why it's tougher to face HIV if you're poor than if you're rich.
  Silk Stocking Liberals
  In trying to be a good "liberal"- compassionate, generous, open- hearted- during my 1982 run for Congress, it occurred to me that conservatives are that way because they are insecure about their social class status.
  Skiing at the Edge
  New names for
  A Social Class Analysis of Vegetables
  An assignment of vegetables into refined patrician or coarse plebeian classes. Future dinner hosts of mine, take note!
  Some Notes on a Method to Stay the Hand of the Torturer
  My cry to do whatever it takes to be effective against the world's torturers.
  Speed Speeds HIV Spread
  Clear evidence that speed abuse is a handmaiden par excellence for HIV contagion.
  Squire Newmeyer's Principles for 21st Century Country House Weekends
  How to be a gracious host when you've got guests for a country weekend.
  Stand Over Your Man
  How the wife of a powerful man should respond when she discovers he's cheating on her.
  A Stepwise Nomenclature of Aging in America
  Proposes precise usage for synonyms of "old", to demarcate that vast timescape between 55 and 105.
  Stern-Men and Bow-Men
  On East Coast rivers and lakes, boatmen propel their craft whilst facing backwards; on the West Coast, they face forwards. Here's why.
  Stories from the Closet
  Reminiscences of being gay in a fraternity at UC Berkeley in the 1960s.
  SYLLABUS First North American Interspecies Conference on the Future of Predation
  Prey and predator join together for an interspecies conference on the future of predation.
  A Tale of Two Worlds
  San Francisco spends generously on HIV prevention, and estimates a cost of $11,000 for each seroconversion avoided. What about preventing HIV infection of Third World babies?
  Telephone Strategies as an Impediment to Homoerotic Love
  Are you the One Who Calls or the One Who Is Called? Are you hesitant to answer the phone when it rings? Find out how your "telephone strategy" is helping or hurting your love life...
  Temporal Theology
  A recommendation that people in Mediterranean climates practice two faiths, one for the dry season and one for the wet season...
  The Ten Best Ideas in the War Against HIV
  Innovations which thus far have saved at least 100,000 American lives- without any help from high technology or the medical mandarinate.
  Ten Commandments for a Ruling Class Which Desires to Endure
  Advice from Cato the Cynic to a ruling class that wants to stay on top.
  Ten HIV Prevention Brainstorms
  AIDS is prevented at the societal level as well as the individual level. Here are ten bright ideas for effective prevention of the former sort.
  Ten Troubling Questions in the [Middle] Age of AIDS
  Here's a list of ten especially intributing things we don't know about AIDS.
  Ten Uses for a Walking Stick
  A century ago, walking sticks were an integral part of the outfit of gentlemen. Here's why they should make a comeback for men who live in the countryside.
  Ten Years of MidCity Numbers
  A sober comparison of 1998 to 1988, and of a publication which, like the Byzantium, is long-lived, quaint, civilized, and slowly decaying.
  Tent People and Blanket People
  By the Opera House, the very rich and the very poor set out their criteria for a successful evening, in very different and very similar manners.
  Testimony about "Speed"
  Recommendations (November 1996) to San Francisco on how to approach "speed" abuse and HIV prevention.
  The Restoration of the Monasteries
  Lots of gay men are tired of the fast life of cities. Let's set up monastic houses for them so they can revive and beautify life in the American countryside.
  These are the Cat Days of Autumn
  A cat lover's claim for equal time with "Dog Days", in autumn rather than summer.
  Thirteen Reasons Why Heroin is Good for America
  The "fix is in" as regards American culture and opiate drugs: they're made for each other.
  Thirteen-Ball Pool
  A proposal of a three-way version of "eight-ball pool", as a metaphor for three-way conflict.
  Three Outrageous Notions
  Highly speculative reflections on the Great Pox and chastity, the persistence of fast-lane sexual behavior, and the impotence of drug abuse treatment.
  Thursday, August 32, 2000
  Why should Leap Day always be in February, when it's so cold? Why not give August the extra day, once in a millennium?
  Toward a General Theory of Public Policy on Drug Abuse
  This General Theory argues that, after Socialists, Libertarians, and Fascists fight one another to exhaustion, Laissez Faire will carry the day.
  Toward a Non-Sexist Language
  Our alphabet once had a 27th letter; this essay tells how we can get it back, and get some gender-neutral pronouns along the way.
  Toward an Hereditary Upper Class
  What things are needed if America is to have a genuine aristocracy? Can such a thing endure?
  The Treaty of Calais
  Explains why English cookery is so inferior to French cuisine: it was all a conspiracy between George IV and Louis XVIII.
  Triumph of the W
  A proposal for collaborating with Leni Riefenstahl, to make a film celebrating America's famous victory in its war with Iraq.
  Tuning In To the Intergalactic Purr
  The cat's purr as resonant with a pervasive intergalactic Intelligence.
  The Turning Point
  Apt quotations for the beginning of the end of the Age of AIDS.
  Turtles All the Way Down
  A cosmic joke in defense of infinite time.
  Tuscany's Seven Rules of the Good Life
  A brief summary of how civilization is manifested in one corner of Europe.
  Twelve Ways to Distinguish an Australian from a New Zealander
  My attempt to teach North Americans the difference between Australians and New Zealanders. It might have been simpler just to say, "think of Texas and Vermont"...
  Two Dialogues on "Apetheid"
  An account of the strange system of "apetheid", or the "separate development of pet species", which was devised by cats to keep dogs in their place.
  Van Savings
  Social-service programs are fond of buying vans to transport their clients; they should be aware of the concept of "negative savings".
  Virtuous Circle
  In some ways life is getting better and better, and that process is feeding upon itself.
  What a Friend We Have in Cheeses
  Three stanzas in praise of cheese.
  What This Country Needs is a Good Five Dollar Cabernet
  Farmer John's guide to getting your money's worth in the too-pricy world of wine by the glass.
  What We Have Gained
  A look at some potential upsides of the September 11th catastrophe.
  What We Have Lost
  A systematic and skeptical survey of nostalgia.
  Why Can't a Dog Be More Like a Cat?
  An examination of that famous musical-comedy song from the 1940s, first sung by Rex Harrison.
  Why We Should Fully Fund ADAP
  A forceful argument for enabling every HIV-infected American to try the "cocktail therapy".
  X at the Crossroads
  Specultations on the future of MDMA.
  Zeno at the Intersection
  "After you, Alfonse" "No, no, after you, Gaston" carried to infinity.

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©2004–2010 by John Newmeyer